TV and Burgers

As we close out 2011, allow me to wish each and every one of my loyal readers a very Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa and Happy Holidays.  I thank you for your loyalty and for making TV & Burgers an overwhelming success. It is now time for Sir Griffin’s annual list of his ten best shows of 2011.  Before you read you do have to remember that this is my list, not yours, and thus if you disagree feel free to make your own list, but do not disparage mine.  I list my shows alphabetically and not in any order of favorites.  Also, there are a lot of shows out there that I just do not watch that are often critically acclaimed and since I’ve never seen them I cannot include them no matter how good they are.  I have never seen Mad Men or Breaking Bad so don’t look for those on this list.  So without further ado I bring you Sir Griffin’s Top 10 of 2011. 2 Broke Girls – From the first episode I fell in love with this show. ...

Survivor: South Pacific has come to an end and it was a great season.  I have to start, however, by pointing out that I was absolutely correct in my prediction of Sophie being the winner.   Brandon  arrived at RI and promptly told Ozzy,   in not so many words, that he was a complete idiot for giving his immunity to Albert.  This was followed by the final RI duel in which Brandon and Ozzy had to hold onto their poles as long as possible.  Wait, that sounds wrong.  Having already seen Ozzy climb palm trees it was obvious that he would be victorious and Brandon would be sent to the jury.  Although Brandon made a game of it, his toes eventually gave out and he was a goner.  Ozzy, was back in the game and not exactly welcomed.  Ozzy, knowing he was going to be voted out immediately had to win immunity, but at the same time try and convince Coach that he was more worthy of keeping around until the end if the dragon slayer wanted a ...

I had no idea I would get this many complaints about not posting a Survivor update.  Sometimes I have busy days.  I understand they are rare, but they do occasionally happen and yesterday was just one of those days.  My apologies. The penultimate episode of Survivor: South Pacific was a doozy.  This may have been the finest episode of a stellar season.  We started off with the five remaining survivors making their way back to camp after ousting Edna.  Then they proceeded to hug, congratulate each other and pray.  Praying has become a recurring theme for this season and this episode had plenty of it.  While I have absolutely no trouble with anyone taking time to pray, I do have a problem with foolish prayers.  Again, if God is spending all of his/her time watching Survivor and is overly concerned about the outcome then our world is way more screwed up than I initially thought.  But, the happiness would soon be wearing off ...

Before I get started I want to offer a suggestion for Survivor.  Next summer you need to have Survivor: Hantz vs. Wade where eight members of Brandon’s family battle against eight members of Coach’s family.  This will likely be the greatest season in Survivor history and will be especially exciting to see how they turn on each other.  Much like how Papa Sean Hantz could not believe how poorly his son was playing the game and shocked he was not yet eliminated.  Plus, the way Papa Sean approached Coach to ensure that Brandon would make the final three seemed eerily to the Godfather making him an offer he couldn’t refuse.  Just a thought for you producers out there.  I also am reporting to you now that I have officially decided to discontinue my Survivor recaps after this fall season ends.  Sorry my friends, but I’m just tired of doing it.  If you’re lucky I may treat you to a solo shot if there is a particularly good episode this win...

After taking a week off for Thanksgiving, Survivor returned with a bang last night.  I learned that Cowboy Guy has a name, Rick, and that he can actually speak.  Seriously, has he been sitting down and watching this with his family and having to say something like “I was there! Really!” Well now they finally have proof.  I also learned that I have a really dirty mind as many things that were spoken made me giggle like a kid.  But, as usual, we will start at the beginning.  Cochran made a charming comment that he felt like he was in league with the Manson Family and he was afraid he was Sharon Tate.  Then he immediately grossed everyone out by telling us a story of how he made phony phone calls as a kid, but was never very good at it.  Cochran said he used to call girls and say “I really want to swap sperm with you.”  Apparently law is the right profession for Cochran as anything in the medical field seems completely out of the questi...

Why the producers of Survivor insist on subjecting us to Redemption Island I have no idea.  For now we are stuck with Jim whining about their lament, Keith standing around looking stupid and Ozzy desperately trying not to say I told you so while simultaneously actually saying I told you so.  Ozzy is both a moron and an oxymoron.  As Te Tuna returned to camp, Coach made a point of telling Whitney & Dawn that they had nothing to worry about and he was worried about Albert plotting something against him.  Now why Coach chose to lie to them I had no idea.  Seriously, he had been saying ever since the merge that they would be picking off the old Savaii one by one so why did they have nothing to worry about?  I’ll give Whitney credit, for once, because she noted that most of Upolu would never get to the finals with Coach.  She could not believe how “smart people could be so stupid”.  This coming from a girl that not only sings country...

Cochran was the victim of a tirade from Jim, Ozzy & Whitney when they returned to the Te Tuna camp.  Seriously, is that the best name they could think of?  Te Tuna?  It’s awful.  Anyway, Jim told Cochran that he was a coward and used some choice words to describe him.  Whitney told Cochran that she was disgusted by him and proved she had a potty mouth that was on par with Jim.  I’ve said previously that Whitney is hot, but she really turned me off last night.  When a woman berates a nerd for playing a game and uses her potty mouth to do so it really is unsettling.  But Ozzy was a little different.  Ozzy called Cochran a “wiener”.  I don’t know why, but it made me laugh.  Ozzy took him aside to talk to him and they were interrupted by Brandon.  Gotta love Brandon despite all his faults.  He has become another gift from the Survivor gods.  Brandon has appointed himself as Cochran’s bodyguard and he want...

This entry may be a tad shorter than usual today.  I’ve got a headache, I’m in a foul mood and I am extremely tired.  This is unfortunate because we had a whale of show last night.  My apologies, but let’s get right to the point. At the RI duel we learned that Ozzy is the world’s worst actor.  Seriously, I think I saw better acting in Busty Cops 3.  When Ozzy came out it raised a few eyebrows on the Upolu tribe and Ozzy should have let it at that.  Instead, he babbled endlessly about how he was fooled by Cochran and was seeking vengeance.  Albert said “I don’t buy it” and by the looks on the faces of Upolu no one else did either.  Well, maybe Edna.  I found it hard to believe that Jeff was able to not burst out laughing, but the look on his face clearly showed that he wanted to do so.  The duel itself was one we had seen before: each person would have to tie together a pole and reach three sets of keys to unlock a gate a...

I finally have it figured out.  I know why there are tsunamis, earthquakes, teabaggers and other natural disasters.  I know why there is cancer, muscular dystrophy, Herman Cain and other diseases.  It’s because God does not care about those things as he/she is all consumed with Survivor.  God cannot be bothered with starvation and poverty because he/she loves listening to Coach tell him/her that he is not worthy.  (On a side note is it okay for God to call Coach Benjamin?  Just asking.)  God has to watch Survivor as it has now become a weekly prayer meeting for the Upolu tribe.  God must really love game shows set in tropical climates.  I’m sorry, but if God is truly interested in whether or not Upolu wins a challenge then we have some serious issues upstairs.  More on this insanity later. Our episode begins right off with Christine and the lovely Mikayla at the Redemption Island challenge.  Each contestant had to take...

Can someone please explain to me who or what Coach is winking and saluting to?  I cringe every time he does it.  He gets this shit eating grin and salutes.  Why?  To what purpose?  Is he saluting the camera operators?  Is there a hot girl behind the scenes that he is winking at?  Does he suddenly see his reflection in a mirror and then pronounce his undying love for himself?  Oh wait, he loves Brandon now and Brandon loves Coach, but we’ll delve into that later. Our episode began with a very angry Ozzy throwing a fit over Elyse being voted out at TC.  Now if he had been complaining that the hottest girl on either tribe had just been ousted that would be one thing, but Ozzy was whining and crying because they did it behind his back.  Oh boo hoo Ozzy, haven’t you played this game enough to know how it is played?  Instead of just manning up and refocusing his efforts to be indispensible to the tribe, Ozzy declares himse...