TV and Burgers

Although I have chosen not to do the weekly Survivor recaps I am still watching and I am absolutely loving this season.  This entry will not be a recap, per se, but rather a complete appreciation for what is being offered to the viewing audience this season.  There are certain things that Survivor needs to be successful year after year and the producers have done a masterful job of getting these roles filled. • Stupid people • Hot girls • A villain • Two guys that refer to themselves as Tarzan (this is rare) • More stupid people The Beautiful Chelsea First of all we have the incredibly sexy and beautiful Chelsea Meissner from South Carolina.  I am not afraid to admit that I am completely infatuated with her.  Whenever she is on screen she is all I can see.  If there is a group shot on the screen that flashes by in a second I will rewind and pause so I can see her standing there.  Sad?  Maybe, but I don’t care.  Pathetic?...

Why the producers of Survivor insist on subjecting us to Redemption Island I have no idea.  For now we are stuck with Jim whining about their lament, Keith standing around looking stupid and Ozzy desperately trying not to say I told you so while simultaneously actually saying I told you so.  Ozzy is both a moron and an oxymoron.  As Te Tuna returned to camp, Coach made a point of telling Whitney & Dawn that they had nothing to worry about and he was worried about Albert plotting something against him.  Now why Coach chose to lie to them I had no idea.  Seriously, he had been saying ever since the merge that they would be picking off the old Savaii one by one so why did they have nothing to worry about?  I’ll give Whitney credit, for once, because she noted that most of Upolu would never get to the finals with Coach.  She could not believe how “smart people could be so stupid”.  This coming from a girl that not only sings country...

Cochran was the victim of a tirade from Jim, Ozzy & Whitney when they returned to the Te Tuna camp.  Seriously, is that the best name they could think of?  Te Tuna?  It’s awful.  Anyway, Jim told Cochran that he was a coward and used some choice words to describe him.  Whitney told Cochran that she was disgusted by him and proved she had a potty mouth that was on par with Jim.  I’ve said previously that Whitney is hot, but she really turned me off last night.  When a woman berates a nerd for playing a game and uses her potty mouth to do so it really is unsettling.  But Ozzy was a little different.  Ozzy called Cochran a “wiener”.  I don’t know why, but it made me laugh.  Ozzy took him aside to talk to him and they were interrupted by Brandon.  Gotta love Brandon despite all his faults.  He has become another gift from the Survivor gods.  Brandon has appointed himself as Cochran’s bodyguard and he want...

I’m just telling you now that if anyone calls me by my first name I am going to go nuts.  I am the Big Blogger damn it!  No one has called me by my first name since I was eight.  Even my parents call me the Big Blogger.  Even before there was such a thing as a blogger I was called the Big Blogger.  Now, I realize how ridiculous that sounds, but Coach?  Well he went nuts a long time ago so I am guessing he has no clue, but we’ll delve into that with a little more detail later. Our show began as so many others have in the past, with Brandon crying and saying bad things about Mikayla.  Seriously, this guy has a lot of issues and maybe tossing him out in front of cameras with a bunch of strangers was not the best idea.  I know they do all sorts of psychological testing before sending anyone out, but I think they just gave Brandon a pass due to the Hantz name.  Who would have thought that Russell would be the more stable member of ...

What a wild night.  Not so much on Survivor, but with the Rays battling back from a 7-0 deficit to win in 12 innings combined with the collapse of the Red Sox gave Tampa Bay the American League Wild Card.  Meanwhile, the Phillies played hard while respecting the integrity of the game and knocked the Braves out of the playoffs giving the Cardinals the National League Wild Card.  I will say that I loved seeing Carl Crawford miss that fly ball against Baltimore .  It’s poetic justice for spurning the Rays and signing with the enemy.  What a night! Survivor was fun too, but I will admit that I was a bit preoccupied.  However, our episode began with Christine whining about Coach, but then again that’s something we all have done at one time or another.  She then compared him to King Farouk, who was the King of Egypt from 1936 until he was overthrown and exiled to Italy in 1952.  Christine obviously has something here because I thin...

A new season of Survivor has begun and that means it is time for Sir Griffin to begin blogging once again.  I have to say that I really like this cast of characters.  It has everything one would want, but most of all three extremely hot babes.  Again, I renew my call for a season of nothing but hot babes, but I digress. After our 16 new castaways rowed ashore, Jeff informed them that they would be aided by two former castaways. Yes, I'd stare at Mikayla's boobs too.  Immediately it turned into a chorus of "not Russell" which young Brandon Hantz (who based on the on screens displays apparently does not work because his occupation was listed as Russell's nephew) found amusing.  We learned that Brandon has tattoos that say "Hantz" that he does not want anyone to see thus he plans on keeping his shirt on the entire time.  We also learned that Brandon has a boob fetish, but more on that later. We already know that the returning players are Coach and ...

It’s not particularly difficult to sum up this season of Survivor. It was Rob’s game from the beginning. While Russell came in with a giant target on his back and was instantly hated by most everyone, Rob came in like the beloved hero and savior and walked away with it all. I can’t say I wanted Rob to win, but if you go by who played the best then Rob was the obvious choice. On Redemption Island we had our inhabitants preparing for their final challenge to get back into the game while at the same time reminiscing about their days on RI. You’d think it was the Ritz the way they were talking about it. Even Matt had learned to love it after spending a record 29 days out there. I guess Jesus told him he’d better love it. The final challenge in the RI arena was one of balance and endurance. Matt, Grant, Mike and Andrea had to use a foot to balance an urn on the end of a board. Kind of like holding a seesaw level for an extended period of time. Unfortunately for Matt all that ti...

I have never been particularly found of things that are schmaltzy or sappy and thus I have never been a fan of the loved ones from home episodes of Survivor.  Don’t get me wrong I still love the show, but I could certainly do without parents, siblings and friends showing up.  I think that the time at camp needs to remain more secretive.  If you are on the show or working there you get to see it.  If not, it’s off limits.  But, it is what it is and because of that I do what I do, whatever that is.  Capiche?  Our story began with some male bonding out on Redemption Island.  Surprised to see Steve show up immediately after Ralph, he was met with great adulation.  Steve looked like a beaten man.  He had been through the trials of Survivor and was about as enthusiastic as a rock.  I got the feeling he just wanted to leave.  Poor Steve. The Ometepe Six are back at camp too and celebrating their domination of Zapatera....

Our show opened with the tribe returning from the racially wild tribal council we witnessed last week.  Steve, being ever the gentleman, reached out to Phillip and told him that there was no apologies needed and that all their problems were in the past.  They shook hands, made nice and went to bed.  (Not together)  But Phillip was not buying any of it.  Not even for a dollar.  Nope, Phillip felt that Steve was not being “genuous”, which can only mean one of two things: 1. Phillip has been taking English lessons from Ralph or 2. Phillip is an avid user of the Sarah Palin dictionary. Either way it was perfectly fine with Boston Rob who proclaimed that “as long as he (Phillip) keeps up his stupid antics he’ll be coming with me all the way to the finals”.  If Rob does get to the finals it would be difficult to vote against him seeing that he has played a masterful game and has five people following him like puppies.  And besides that ...

What is the deal with Phillip and rice?  Whenever rice is around Phillip turns from mild mannered former federal agent (?) to a crazy lunatic.  Excuse me, but I must clarify that I mean nothing bad or racist by calling Phillip a crazy lunatic.  Crazy knows no color.  Just look at Charlie Sheen.  But before we delve into Phillip’s issues we must start at the top where we find Matt talking to the sky. Poor Matt; so gullible, so dumb and still such a threat despite his wanting to get out of the game.  And who could blame him?  Matt has spent the majority of his time isolated on Redemption Island and despite his victories he is still public enemy number one to Rob.  Matt opened the show by praying to God and telling him/her that he wanted to get out of the game, but for some reason Matt was under the assumption that God wanted him to stay.  Let me explain something to Matt.  You have free will.  You have the right to choose...